May 07, 2002

Free Pants!

"Free pants!" I say, coming into the bedroom, waving them around. "Yes, dear," says Ann Marie. "Free pants!" I say again. "Yes, dear. They sent you three pairs," says Ann Marie. "I thought it was two pairs?" say I. And it is true: Land's End has sent me free pants. Land's End has sent me multiple pairs of free pants. I am not sure whether the correct number is two or three.

Why is Land's End sending me multiple pairs of free pants?

"It's because you're a typical American male," said Ann Marie, when the first email from Land's End--send us your measurements and we'll send you a free pair of pants--showed up in my inbox. "They're guessing that you don't like to shop, value convenience above all, and will pay through the nose just to avoid having to go to the store. So they bait you--send us your measurements and we'll send you a free, customized pair of pants. And then, forever after, every month they send you an email saying, 'Click here, and we'll send you a pair of pants. And you'll do it.'"

And she was right. Every month, that email from Land's End shows up in my inbox. Sometimes I click, and in due course a new pair of pants shows up. Ann Marie sniffs: "I have bought ten times as much stuff from Land's End's overstock website as you've bought from all of Land's End online. And they've never offered *me* a free pair of pants."

The only bug in the system is that Land's End made me this offer twice... or was it three times? Why? I don't know. I presume that their computer couldn't figure out that Brad DeLong <> and J. Bradford DeLong <> were actually the same person, and so sent the "send-us-your-measurements-and-we'll-give-you-a-free-pair-of-pants" email once to each address.

Now I am tempted to set my browser's email to, or some such, poke the Land's End computer again, and see what it will do...

Meanwhile, there has been a slight change in the economy: There is a fraction less of a job in men's pants sales and tailoring in California; there is a fraction more of a job keeping a server running somewhere where Land's End keeps its servers; and somewhere in Mexico a factory has shifted its mix of products to occasionally make not the normal run of pants that then need to be altered, but a special pair of pants made just for me.

Posted by DeLong at May 7, 2002 03:09 PM | TrackBack


can i please have some free no money pants

Posted by: ashleyipock on September 25, 2002 04:00 PM


i want free pant.

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Posted by: jewelry store on October 12, 2003 04:10 PM


By the way im arvin from philippines, i see your site that your giving a free pants, im interested of that cause is free(you know, no money) and im welling to ask it if it is ok to you.
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thank you
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always arvin

Posted by: arvin w. eyano on October 31, 2003 04:41 AM


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