It's interesting what things strike people as too wrong to be credited--what things break the willing suspension of disbelief of the reader or watcher. In the Fellowship of the Ring movie, for example, I had no problem with hobbits or wizards or magic fireworks or Rings of Power with "ash nazg durbatuluk..." inscribed on them in letters of fire. But there was a huge jolt of disbelief when I saw Frodo and Samwise trudging in front of a snow-capped mountain range. "Huh!" I thought to myself. "There are no mountains that close to the Shire that could still have snow in them in September."
Others found themselves troubled by, in the Lord of the Rings movies, the lack of a logistical train for the Rohirrim, or the fact that a preindustrial society had somehow managed to dye thousands of cloaks the same identical color, or the fact that Caras Galadon would be devastated by a storm that caused a single mallorn tree to fall, or the extraordinary variation of appearance of the ents, or the speed with which the walls of Minas Tirith crumbled under bombardment, or the fact that the Rohirrim braided their horses' manes and yet never washed their own hair.
At times, I have found myself breaking the willing suspension of disbelief because of things that very few people know. For example, my belief in this ms.:
DEAR SIR OR MADAM:
I HAVE ENCLOSED AN OUTLINE AND THE FIRST THREE CHAPTERS OF MY NOVEL THE AFRICAN PRISONER. IT'S THE THRILLING, FAST-PACED STORY OF AN ORDINARY BANK CLERK IN LAGOS, NIGERIA, WHO ONE DAY FINDS HIMSELF IN POSSESSION OF SEVENTEEN MILLION DOLLARS ($17 MILLION) IN FUNDS LEFT BEHIND BY A CORRUPT BUREAUCRAT WHO DIES IN A PLANE CRASH. IN A DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO RECLAIM PART OF THE MONEY, HE MANAGES TO MAKE CONTACT WITH A KINDLY AMERICAN WIDOW WHO LENDS HIM THE USE OF HER BANK ACCOUNT. WHAT FOLLOWS IS AN EXCITING, DEADLY CAT-AND-MOUSE GAME WITH NIGERIAN CON MEN, PRIVATE DETECTIVES, AND THE FBI BUNCO/FRAUD DIVISION....
was broken because I--as a former Deputy Assistant Secretary of the Treasury*--know that it is the Secret Service, not the FBI, that has principal jurisdiction over money laundering and related international financial crimes.
*I should say that as a former Deputy Assistant Secretary, I will buy any novel by Paula Volsky on sight in hardback, because she made a Deputy Assistant Secretary into the hero in her book The Gates of Twilight .
Posted by DeLong at February 20, 2004 03:13 PM | TrackBack | | Other weblogs commenting on this postI, myself, was in awe of the multi-tiered city of Minas Tirith, which was situated at the intersection of a stony mountain and a barren plain, and where, apparently, no fields were needed to sustain the crops and animals consumed by the tens of thousands of people who lived within the walls.
Posted by: TedL on February 20, 2004 03:18 PMThere's a reason why it was called the "Battle of Pelennor Fields, you know.
Also, there's that big river right next to it. And Minas Tirith is the capital of Gondor, and is an imporant trade an imperial hub.
Next, you're going to tell stories about some fantastic city called "Classical Athens" that was supposedly a giant iron-age cultural and imperial hub, even though it was located on a spit of rocky, inhospitable land. Why, some people even claim that it was able to feed itself almost entirely by shipping in food from thousands of miles away (Egypt, Ukraine) through a fortified port that was connected to the city by miles of defensive walls!
Posted by: FMguru on February 20, 2004 04:15 PMProfessor, you have been spending WAY too much time reading TNH's thread on book publishing.
tsk tsk.
Francis
Posted by: FDL on February 20, 2004 04:22 PMFMguru: good point
Also, ancient Rome:
By the time of Augustus, Rome had reached an unprecedented one million inhabitants, which required up to 40 million modii every year (Rickman, p.10), about 300,000 tons of grain. To do this, the entire agricultural output of the empire had to be geared to support the stomach of the capitol of the Empire. At first, they used Etruria and Sicily. Later, once Egypt was in the fold, and was entirely a domain of the Emperor, Egypt became the breadbasket of the Empire (Rickman, pp. 12-13).
From Rickman, Geoffrey. "The Corn Supply of Ancient Rome." Oxford: Clarendon Press, 1980.
The thing that always bothered me about Fellowship fo the Ring was the last shot: Frodo and Sam staring out over (to their right) to Mordor. But if you look on any map of Middle Earth you see that Mordor is in the east. Frodo and Sam are north/west of Mordor, near the falls. Shouldn't Mordor be on their left?
What have I been missing?
Posted by: Simon on February 20, 2004 05:42 PMGIANT METAL ROBOTS.
That's the phrase a friend of mine came up with for when people start talking like this. It came from a viewing of the film Iron Giant. Whenever someone pointed out a minor inconsistency, she replied "It's a movie about giant metal robots. Let it go."
Posted by: Thlayli on February 20, 2004 06:17 PMWe go to all the trouble to add permalinks to comments, and yet when you quote Robert LeGault's brilliant spoof, do you (ahem)
http://nielsenhayden.com/makinglight/archives/004641.html#39724
--link? You do not! I give up. Life sucks. A-list bloggers suck. I'm going to crawl away in a huff and end it all.
(Or maybe not.)
Posted by: Patrick Nielsen Hayden on February 20, 2004 06:22 PMI apologize. I repent. I abase myself. I voluntarily add three years onto my time to be spent in Purgatory, and volunteer to spend it putting footnotes and reference lists into full Chicago Manual of Style form...
Posted by: Brad DeLong on February 20, 2004 06:53 PMI must point out that in the original text-based version of _The Return of the King_, the Rohirrim explicitly verify that Gondor has enough stores to feed them, so they can travel light and not worry about a "logistical tail".
Am I a geek yet?
I hereby name you a geek...
Posted by: Brad DeLong on February 20, 2004 07:22 PMFMguru: In the text-based version, the Pelennor fields are "rich townlands" not a bloody great paddock.
Simon: The hobbits are north of Mordor, heading east, looking for a way down from the Emyn Muil.
It always bothered me that the Shire, after 1400 years of hobbits breeding like rabbits, should have been a Malthusian nightmare.
Posted by: Abu Frank on February 20, 2004 11:03 PMFunny you should mention this ... I had always seen Middle Earth as some kind of proto-Europe, take the English channel out, it isn't convenient; then we have the Shires, Normandy, the Black Forest, the fires of the Ruhr ... ;-)
So in watching the movie (Fellowship) all was well until the Hobbits were running through a cornfield.
CORN? But that is from the Americas! It wouldn't be there then!
:-)
Posted by: Robert Ullmann on February 20, 2004 11:49 PMGoing along with the Middle Earth/Europe analogy, the Misty Mountains are the Alps. Come September you will find an Alp or two with snow for our Hobbit pals to trek through while our Elf buddy, Legolas walks on top.
Posted by: John Guidry on February 21, 2004 10:15 AMBrad: To get geeky on you from another angle, you write: I--as a former Deputy Assistant Secretary of the Treasury*--know that it is the Secret Service, not the FBI, that has principal jurisdiction over money laundering and related international financial crimes. I--as a temporary Treasury drone who worked on international financial crimes--am reasonably sure that it is the Financial Crimes Enforcement Network (FinCEN), not the Secret Service, that deals with money laundering and related matters of international financial crime.
The Secret Service is concerned with counterfeiting.
Posted by: Dan Drezner on February 21, 2004 11:25 AMhttp://www.secretservice.gov/alert419.shtml
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Robert Ullmann wrote on February 20, 2004 11:49 PM:
"So in watching the movie (Fellowship) all was well until the Hobbits were running through a cornfield.
"CORN? But that is from the Americas! It wouldn't be there then!"
Middel-Earth also had other plants we'd think of as "from the Americas": 'taters (po-TAY-toes, as Sam tells Gollum), tomatoes (to-MAH-toes, as Merry says over the cooking fire on Weathertop), and pipeweed (which, Tolkien explicitly wrote, was "probably a variety of Nicotiana").
Recall that LOTR takes place very long before the lands assumed their present shape. There is no reference to any "Americas"; such areas may not yet have been settled by the race of Men. Ages have passed, presumably including Ice Ages. Migration of peoples and their crops, followed by the extinction of some plant species in their former habitats, may account for these seeming discrepancies.
Alternate answer: it's a fantasy, don't get hung up on the real-world historical questions.
My own balking comes at other biological and physical details.
Shelob is shown to have a venomous sting at her back end. But spiders inject venom by biting, not tail-stings; the back end has a web-spinner instead. (What ammunition this could provide for those who claim that LOTR is racist: "Even the spider is a WASP.")
Gollum falls into a river of molten lava from a height of over fifty feet. He lands gently on his rear and back, still admiring his Precious (held up in his open hand), and his expression only begins to change from joy to distress as he slowly sinks below the surface of the lava. No crushing impact, no great gout of splash, no jolting of the Ring from his hand, and above all no steam explosion — even as the lava closes over his eyes.
These were the points at which I could not sustain my suspension of disbelief. Magic, okay; trolls and balrogs and wraiths and the fiery Eye, okay; but not a tail-stinging spider, or that gentle fall and unburning submersion.
Patrick Nielsen Hayden was kind enough to call my attention to your comment on my little piece of whimsy on his wife Teresa's blog, and I feel I ought to put the piece in context and offer at least a mild defense.
The whole thing started with an offhand comment from author John M. Ford regarding the possibility of submitting unsolicited manuscripts ("slush," for those not in the publishing world) to a publisher via email: "Slushspam!"
This led me to imagine: What if some of the usual spammer suspects decided to submit manuscripts to a publisher? After all, there's no reason why a spammer or a Nigerian con man couldn't write a book, or even a good book. (In fact, there's an English con man, whose name escapes me at the moment, who did write some decent crime fiction. Write what you know, they say.) Besides the fictitious proposal you quote, there was a penis enlargement book and a purported novel about college girls with a webcam. Perhaps there could be other novels on submission: one involving Viagra changing a man's life, another where the protagonist grows rich investing in biotech stocks, etc.
But the African swindlers are certainly the spammers with the most highly developed literary style, as well as with the most powerful imaginations. They are to the run-of-the-mill spammers as Gabriel García Márquez is to Tom Clancy. You may be a former Deputy Assistant Secretary of the Treasury, but, would you believe it!: the widow of the late dictator of Zaïre, Mobutu Sese Seko, once one of the richest men in the world, wrote to me personally--me, a lowly freelance copy editor!--to offer me a part in recovering millions of dollars! (Perhaps I can work out a trade with her for some shares I happen to own in the Brooklyn Bridge Redevelopment Corporation.)
So, I was trying to imagine what sort of letter one of these enterprising fellows might send to a publisher. In doing so, I was putting myself in his shoes. And what does one of these flimflam artists really know about the structure of the American criminal justice system? Precious little, I'd venture to guess. And thus I wrote from the point of view, not of my own knowledge, but from what I imagined his might be.
An example: In the current film The Last Samurai, the American mercenary played by Tom Cruise tells his Japanese comrade that 300 Spartans temporarily held off a million Persian soldiers at the battle of Thermopylae. Now in fact, modern historians believe the Persian army was a good bit smaller than that. But in the 1870s, when the story takes place, Cruise's character would have known this bit of history only from Herodotus (directly or indirectly), not from later scholarship--and Herodotus tells us that the Persian army was a million men strong. So when I was watching the movie, that bit threw me off for a moment, till I thought about it and realized it was perfectly correct in context.
And in fact, a novel I recently got through copy editing, that is, a book that was actually bought by a well-known publisher, featured a U.S. Senator being protected by the Secret Service. I can't name names, but it was by a writer who has already published a number of novels. I pointed out to the author that the Secret Service--please correct me if I'm wrong here--only protects the current and former Presidents and Vice Presidents, Presidential candidates, visiting foreign dignitaries, and certain memebers of their families, and that in fact they are only authorized by law to protect those persons. I have no idea how he responded to my comment. Hopefully he reworked things somehow. But if an actual, successful American author can be confused about the duties of the Secret Service, it's not too much of a stretch for a fictitious Nigerian to be confused too.
However, I promise that if I ever assume the persona of that con man and actually write the novel, it will be a team of Secret Service agents--one an older, by-the-book guy, the other a young, impetuous, idealistic sort who'll do anything to track down lawbreakers--assisted by a courageous Deputy Assistant Secretary of the Treasury, who puts his career on the line to make the higher-ups face the magnitude of the international incident that's threatening--who bring the criminals to justice.
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