The MinuteMan is searching...
JustOneMinute: ...for three word summaries of each party. I welcome suggestions - does describing the Dems as the party of muddled good intentions seem terribly unfair?
Let me, for one, be the first to say that IMHO the MinuteMan has gotten it just right: "The Party of Muddled Good Intentions" is a label this Democrat would be proud to march under.
But what should we call the Republicans? "The Party Where You Have to Constantly Reassure the Base That Jesus Will Not Be Really Angry If Ariel Sharon Withdraws From the Gaza Strip"? This is proving really hard...
Posted by DeLong at June 5, 2004 04:23 PM | TrackBack | | Other weblogs commenting on this postThis is too easy:
Republicans:
Evil Lying Bastards
Democrats
We're Not Insane
The only important observation to be made about the Republicans is that they are the custodians, in this time and place, of the totalitarian impulse. I cannot think of a way to fit that into precisely three words.
By the same token, nothing can be said about any other party except that they are not the Republicans.
Posted by: Frank Wilhoit on June 5, 2004 05:04 PM
Simple. The Republicans are the party of punishing evildoers.
Of course, they get frustrated because it's so hard to catch the actual evildoers, and they want to punish somebody...
Boil the Republicans down into five words:
I got mine, screw you.
Posted by: Linkmeister on June 5, 2004 06:36 PMRepublicans: Pure F******* Evil
Democrats: Not 100% Evil.
Right?
Posted by: Classic Liberal on June 5, 2004 06:37 PMI don't think the Republicans are so much evil, as they are the party of anxiety catharsis. They're anxious and afraid, so they seek ways to cathartically confront their fears and anxieties. Howsat sound?
Posted by: Julian Elson on June 5, 2004 07:02 PM"Party of anxiety catharsis" is good...
Posted by: Brad DeLong on June 5, 2004 07:04 PMParty of self-righteous fraud
Posted by: Jed Harris on June 5, 2004 07:28 PMNot three words, but my Bush-Cheney slogan is "Incompetence in the service of illusion."
I've also taken to calling Bush "Mendacious B".
Posted by: EH on June 5, 2004 09:20 PMFor the (R)s, how about
Apocalypse Upon US, or
Satan Citing Scripture
Even better:
(D) "What's up doc?"
(R) "I'm hunt'in wabbits"
It's got everything, the (D) as the stereotypical vegan (only eats carrots), while the (R) is the gun toting redneck with a speech impediment.
Posted by: PR on June 6, 2004 09:27 AMThe "Left Behind" Party
Posted by: son volt on June 6, 2004 05:26 PMLet's make them:
the "recent election losers" or "out of power" or "the minority party"!!!!
or the Republican lame ducks!
Posted by: tjallen on June 6, 2004 06:11 PMRepublicans in a nutshell:
"What's the fun of having a treehouse if you can't pull up the ladder?"
Posted by: Davis X. Machina on June 6, 2004 08:58 PMThe Party of Inevitably Corrupted Principles
Posted by: mf on June 7, 2004 02:25 AMWhoa! All the black people we disenfranchised were gonna vote against us? What are the odds?! The voting machines only made mistakes one way? What luck! A bunch of GOP operatives kept the votes from being counted? Fancy that! The biggest GOP fundraisers got cushy government contracts? Luck-Ee!
The party of Remarkably Convenient Coincidences.
Posted by: Kip W on June 7, 2004 08:47 AMRepublicans:
The Party of Greed
Dems:
The Party of Envy
Anxiety Catharsis also fits the conclusions of this study: "Political Conservatism as Motivated Social Cognition," John T. Jost, a professor at Stanford University, Jack Glaser and Frank J. Sulloway, professors at the University of California, Berkeley, and Arie W. Kruglanski, a professor at the University of Maryland
Although it was attacked by the right-wing media hounds, or at least NRO, as the kind of partisan "conservatives are crazy" foolishness on which our tax dollars ought not to be wasted, it does find that when people are worried they vote more to the conservative. Good stuff and food for thought, especially on winning elections in the face of terrorism.
Posted by: Gordon on June 7, 2004 10:36 PMWell, the Prof's entry is hopelessly over the word limit, but, as is often the case, Country and Western music provides a shorter slogan for the Reps:
Jesus Loves Me (But He Can’t Stand You)
Still too long...
Posted by: Tom Maguire on June 8, 2004 10:52 AM"The only important observation to be made about the Republicans is that they are the custodians, in this time and place, of the totalitarian impulse. I cannot think of a way to fit that into precisely three words."
Rightly said Frank.
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Culpam poena premit comes - Punishment closely follows crime as its companion. (Horace)
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